Kerjaan dan Keluarga

I recently figured out that why I want to be an accountant. Do you ever get the feeling that you'll never find a job you actually like? I'm almost 26, planning to get a master's degree in a pretty specific field, and I had a very promising career path. So why do I feel like the last several years of school have been a mistake and I should have gone into engineering or some shit where I have to be on the factory floor a lot rather than dealing with fewer people or be at a desk? I just know, though, that if I had gone into engineering I'd be regretting that for some other reason. My guess is that since I was not so talented in school at a young age, I took the path of least resistance and never learned diligence or people skills. So now I'm afraid of hard work and dealing with others, and every method of getting money involves at least one of those.

More guessing than anything else. When I was answering interview questions, I realized two things: 1) I don't actually have a ton of real experience, even though I've studied it a lot but 2) some of it sounds stressful as shit or beyond my capability. Sadly, not only do I hate work, but I have recently discovered that I hate people as well. Shit sucks, yo. I figured that if I was going to be a misanthrope, it would have happened earlier. I've long since given up on that. I'm just trying to cultivate a social life. It doesn't matter how much money I have as long as I can do fun things with people I like. For me, fun things is basically hanging out. Shame I'm an unlikeable piece of shit who can't make new friends, really. I also do not have a dream job, so I am content with it, however. I guess my dream job would be fapping and vidya all day and getting paid a ton of money for it. But that doesn't exist, which I think is the important part.

People in Western civilization have the luxury of not having to be super decisive. If they end up fucking hating the job, feel free to go back to school. They can always go back to school. Everyone hates their job. Luckily there's group therapy for it. They meet at the bar everyday after 5 o'clock- I think George Carlin said that. :)

Am I an asshole for not wanting anything to do with my family? Am I selfish because I want to do what I want? If this has to depend on my culture, I am Asian so my family is really tightly-woven and perfectly fine. We are there for each other at the drop of a hat, and I don't even like most of them, but that's just how it functions. I hardly talk to any of them even when we are living under the same roof. I am grateful that they are willing to support me, but I want to leave them and live by myself. I'm sure I'll be fine once I move out.

My parents like assuming things about me and bringing up things like "I bought you this guitar for $300 5 years ago" to try and guilt me to do things. And my mother is always complaining about how I am "autistic" and have no friends and social life. I'm want to be upfront with them. I just want to tell them straight up, if they want something, just ask. And if I can't then I can't. Favors aren't obligatory. My family is really condescending, I rarely see them but when I do they talk down to me because I'm not making as much money as I "could" be. Yeah it's like all they care is how much money I'm going to make after I graduate.